Wait - wait - wait -> GO GO GO -> NO NO NO!
After the main booster rocket was released, I found myself pensive about
giving the last push... The last push is also referred to as the "final
sweep". What you'll notice is that there is a last-ditch push effort
that your body naturally wants to activate when shitting. Especially
when your bowels have auto-activated the main dump, you'll be left
sitting there with an empty rectal cavity and your ass will contact
headquarters and ask for clearance to push back.
Headquarters usually gives the OK, but it depends on what kinds of
signals they are getting from the asshair sensors, in-cavity pressure
valves, and rim-torque fluctators ( What Headquarters is usually worried
about is cutting a dump into pieces and making a big mess. What they
prefer is to let the late-stage boosters fall out of the cavity
in-tact.)
There will often be a segment of a dump just hanging there and without a
exit-bay camera, it's a tough call for headquarters to give the go ahead
for a final sweep. It's risky and it takes experience to know what the
right call is. Sometimes you can sit and just wait for a leaflet of
shit to let itself fall out - letting gravity do its magic...
This time, HQ gave the nod to push back, but it was messy... It cut the
last leaflet in pieces and made a hairy pooey mess. That's the risk you
take. You can wait and wait and wait, but eventually, you've got to
either do a final sweep or start wiping. If you wipe without doing a
final sweep, you run the risk of getting a hand/wristful of shit.
That's when things get interesting
I don't find this to be as much of an issue for females and Mrs.
Dumpstin (she doesn't have the hairy abominable snowman taint) but I
could be wrong. We'd love to know about any chicks out there that can
relate.
A messy 6 wiper,
Dumpstin
