Day 48 - NEED CHOPSTICKS!

Day 48 - NEED CHOPSTICKS!
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

Oh, how I would love to haul this rope out of the toilet and put it on

display - with a nice pair of chopsticks... This looks like it would

unravel into a great rope...



This is a nice shit - big, ropey, and fucking green. I'm happy to see

some green shits because when I was a kid, I would take green dumps once

in a while but in the past 4 or 5 years, they have fallen off

dramatically...



Missing those wonder years,

dumpstin

Day 45 - Oh the agony!

Day 45 - Oh the agony!
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

Ok, so sometimes shitting can really suck too. I don't know what my

system is eliminating - but it's something that's causing problems. I'm

thinking that this is part of the colon cleanse... Maybe my body is

rocking some parasites loose... Or some other toxic crap that my body

just couldn't handle... Whatever it is/was, this was certainly not as

joyous as the shit I took about an hour ago...



I've got stomach aches and my transverse colon is feeling less than

sweet. Total diarrhea... STINKS too... I don't know what did it...

Possibly the smoothie? Or maybe I am just working some stuff out...



Fucking CRAZY!!! A ton of tomatoes (ate tomatoes last night)... Oh so

nasty... The cleanup on aisle butthole was nasty too...



With wet poopy fingers,

dumpstin

Day 45 - sheer JOY!

Day 45 - sheer JOY!
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

Dumping really can be one of the most enjoyable, rewarding, and

feel-good experiences of your life...



It's personal to each one of us... And it's the one experience in life

that you have alone. It's the one experience where you go in a room and

spend time with just yourself... And nobody wants to bother you. It's

just you and your naked ass. Nobody talks to you, you don't talk to

anyone, you just sit and shit.



As I shit out food from thanksgiving, I reflect that I'm thankful for my

own toilet. I'm thankful that it has a seat on it. I'm thankful for

the toilet paper on my left. And I'm thankful for the flushing

mechanism that takes my poop on wild, unknown journeys.



Oh the joys of shitting!

dumpstin

Day 44 - Poo Rudder

Day 44 - Poo Rudder
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

Love being on a schedule... Love waking up and dumping... It really does

start you out in the right direction. When you're sitting there with a

turd halfway out your ass - with half of the turd in the water, it's

nice to know that you've got the "rudder of the day" pointing you in the

right direction...

with success in mind,

dumpstin

Day 43 - the day after

Day 43 - the day after
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

I know, really suprising that there was no dump on thanksgiving... You'd

think that with all the cranberries, stuffing, turkey, et. al. that some

shit would have come out. Well, it didn't. See that's why I'm on the

colon cleanse in the first place - I figure that if I don't crap out the

same amount that goes in (minus a little for my huge muscles) then there

is probably some crap lodged in my colon. Anyways, let's take a look at

what stuffing looks like on the way out...



Pass the gravy,

dumpstin

Day 41 - Jabba the Dump

Day 41 - Jabba the Dump
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

This totally looks like Jabba the hut, does it not? Really weird one...

Multicolored with a crazy jabba head that I could probably unravel if I

had some chopsticks.

dumpstin

Day 41 - Asslock

Day 41 - Asslock
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

So I woke up again with a sick-to-my-stomach feeling. And sure enough, I

got up, sat on the toilet, and just then one of Bob Marley's dreadlocks fell

out of my ass. It must have been from that concert that my parents took me

to way back in 1979. we were front row and when he was swingin his dreads

around, one flew off and I had my mouth open. I couldn't help but swallow

it.



26 years later and thanks to ColonixT, I'm finally getting rid of it. Looks

like it's going to be another day of crapping out old memories.



dumpstin

Day 40 - Rope Ladder

Day 40 - Rope Ladder
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

Crazy day - similar to other days when I had a rope come out, I woke up

this morning with a crazy sick to my stomach feeling. I woke up and

instantly dropped rope. Some of the stuff that came out just fell out.

Crazy.



Anyways, add this one to the trophy case... You could definitely build a

ladder out of this rope...



Let the colon cleanse continue!

-dumpstin

Day 39 - red+green=festive!

Day 39 - red+green=festive!
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

Hard to see in the photo, but this shit has a bunch of red stuff in it

and much of the rest of the dump is green...



My colon is ready for the holidays - is yours???



dumpstin

Day 38 - Tortilla Dumpola

Day 38 - Tortilla Dumpola
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

So, we just had tapas for dinner... Delicious... Garlic, pork,

shrimp... And a fried banana. Yum. Tapas are the food that spanish

people invented to keep flies out of their drinks... They would put

these little pieces of bread, etc. over their drinks and that would keep

the flies out. We didn't have a fly problem at dinner, but the food was

delish.



Anyway, my question is, if the flies were that bad, what did they do to

keep the flies off their asses? Cuz this shit stinks.



Con dedos de mierda,

dumpstin

Day 38 - Home Base Bennies

Day 38 - Home Base Bennies
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

There is one benefit to home base that just can't be trumped... The

shower. I mean this wasn't the worst shit in the world, but it was an

8-wiper... So it's nice to be able to jump in the shower and take a

loofah to that ass... Make sure it's all clean.

With poopy fingers,

dumpstin

Day 38 - Just a good ole dump

Day 38 - Just a good ole dump
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

Here's my dump of the day... This is a wake 'n poop. Woke up, pooped.

Now I'm gonna go to the gym and will probably have more poop later.



I bet jessica simpson would like my poop... I'd like to see her poop -

she always talks about pooping and farting... I bet she shits her pants

a lot. If she shit her pants when they were filming dukes of hazzard, I

bet they said " daisy duked in her dukes!"



Happy day,

dumpstin

Day 36 - Move bowels, MOVE!

Day 36 - Move bowels, MOVE!
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

So I need this shit to come out... I know it's coming, but I have to

wait. Shit never comes on your time, it's always on its own time... If

someone wants to invent a useful medical device, invent a bowel mover.

It would send an electric signal to my bowels and trigger them to move.



Yeah, that's unnatural I know. What I might do is try just closing my

eyes and focusing on my breathing... That's it - OH there she goes! We

have movement!!!



Whoa, looking between me legs, it looks pretty streamlined. You know, I

wonder if automobile designers got their inspiration for the Taurus from

some poop...



Anyways, I'm ready to get off the shitter now. It looks like some of my

nest made its way into the bowl. I know you like pics without teepee in

them so I'm going to fish it out for you...



OK, I tried... But I couldn't fuckin do it... Too nasty... Gotta wash up

now...

Dumpstin

Day 36 - here's a picture of my shit

Day 36 - here's a picture of my shit
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

Again, this is day 36 of my 60+ day colon cleanse... I am sitting on the

toilet right now and a turd is slowly making its way out of my ass. I

just looked between my legs and saw confirmation of a turtle head... OK,

NOW THE BOWEL MOVEMENT kicked in like a mofo and pushed that sukka

out... WHOA!!! TOTAL ASSROPE!!! Feels like there's some more shit so

I'm gonna push.. Whoa, that's loose and more soft-serve... This dump is

funkadelic... It's a weird one... Multi-textural... Probbly has

something to do with the shitty food I had 2 nights ago... Anyways, I

hope you like it!



Continuing the cleanse,

dumpstin

Day 35 - PREPARE YOURSELF!

Day 35 - PREPARE YOURSELF!
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

I think it was this band called Mind Bomb who in the 90's wrote this

awesome song - Prepare yourself... Totally insanely fast, really

cool...



Anyway, the guy next to me here in the stall just did the weirdest thing

- it sounds like he was pulling off teepee sheet-by-sheet and getting

ready to wipe... Wait, now the fucker just shut the fucking lights off

in the bathroom - there's a window, but what a weird deal that was...



Anyways, I'm not the kind of guy who gets the paper ready before I shit,

but I can imagine a lot of people do...



OK, now one guy was in here pissing, and then he farted... Then another

guy goes "whoa, that sounded like a loose one... Problems at home?"

Then the other guy goes... "What I do on my time is my business"



Gotta love the men's bathroom



Oh, and this shit has everything to do with the BLT and fries that I had

last night at 11PM at a bar...

dumpstin

Day 34 - Plateau?

Day 34 - Plateau?
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

I think that things in the assrope department are definitely

plateauing. Shits seem pretty normal lately...



For those of you just tuning in, I'm doing a colon cleanse by dr.

Natura. Colonix is the product @ www.drnatura.com. I'm on day 34 and

haven't missed a beat!



I can't necessarily say whether or not I have lost weight only because

of the colonix, but I think it definitely has helped a lot. I lost over

10 lbs, and my fat gut is definitely smaller... Mrs. Dumpstin thinks I

look too skinny... But I like getting rid of fat. I'm sick of having a

fat gut... She likes to rub it, but her hands are always cold... So

IMHO, it's a good thing.



I also don't seem to have as much of an atheletes foot problem... A lot

of people reported that it helps with psoriasis. So far, I agree. 45

days ago, I bought a new bottle of antifungal cream and haven't used it

since I started colon cleansing. That's nice, because having fungus

foot and mildew balls sucks.



Keep Krappin,

dumpstin

Day 33 - smell it!

Day 33 - smell it!
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

Do you smell your teepee after you wipe your ass? I do... Smell IT!!!

You know you want to!!!

dumpstin

Day 32 - poop theory

Day 32 - poop theory
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

I'm not sure whether I should post this on dumpstin.com or

theorybunny.com, but I'm thinking that I've got a theory about how to

get yourself to poop more...



So I was talking with Mrs. Dumpstin the other day and she said she

didn't poop on saturday like she does every other day of the week.

Nothing was different in her diet - she still took her colonix(tm) colon

cleanse and coffee.. But she didn't take her routine morning dump. I

was thinking - and then - it hit me... She didn't WALK to work that

day! She just sat on the couch, painted the crap off her nails, and

didn't poop... Typically, she walks to the train and walks to work...



Walking causes you to poop! Your body uses the rhythmic gravitational

forces to help move poop along the way...



OK, the guy's phone in the stall next to me didn't answer his phone that

just rang - classic.



Anyway, that's my basic theory... And I think its pretty valid. Check

for yourself - when you start walking around, and you've got a full

colon your body will start sending shit toward your rectum...



So, if you're constipated, try dumpstin's 3 part colon blow plan:

1. Drink 8 glasses of water a day

2. Eat a high fiber diet (it's easy in america to go through a whole day

without hardly any fiber)

3. Exercise - at least take a walk around the block or do some jumping

jacks... Get those intestines vibrating. They need your help!!!



Ok, gotta go - little lady is waiting (oh and that guy in the stall next

to me's phone just rang again - and he didn't answer)

dumpstin

Day 31 -Thin to Win

Day 31 -Thin to Win
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

This dump is streamlined like a lithuanian luge racer... Thin, agile,

and well built. I like dumps with a little more heft, but I'm not going

to say that a dump isn't a blessing.... Because it is... They all are

dumpstin

Day 31 - Home Base

Day 31 - Home Base
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

I think that colons are smarter than we think... I was just getting

ready to head out and go pump some iron when this dump came on... The

dump said to me " hey, I know we're gonna be gone for an hour at least,

and the bathroom at the gym is disgusting as hell, so I'm gonna put on

some mad dump pains now and make this shit happen"



If I wouldn't have headed toward the door, I assure you, nothing would

have happened... My colon would have stalled... It knows that dumping

is hard work, so it puts it off and procrastinates... But you get to a

point and your colon realizes that some things are worse than others..



And there's nothing worse than dumping away from a familiar locale...

Home base is the best...



-dumpstin

Day 29! A long day... Finally!

Day 29! A long day... Finally!
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

Wow, a long day of non-dumping... Isn't it the worst when you can't seem

to shit... Now, I'm shitting... @ 11:15 on a friday night. That's what

Dumpstin does on friday nights... He shits.

Oooh... It's hot. What's with all these hot craps lately? I had a tuna

sandwich for lunch, a grilled cheese sandy for dinner... For breakfast

I had raisin toast... Nothing spicy today so that's kinda strange..

Unless my poop is still coming out from yesterday's huevos and refried

beans...



Oh, speaking of refried beans, that reminds me - if anyone wants to send

in a guest poop, just send it to:

Attn: Customer Service

GuestRelations<@ symbol>dumpstin(dot)com



We'll take a look at it and as long as it doesn't violate any copyrights

or trademarks held by competing poo blogs, we'll put it up!



All the best,

dumpstin

Day 28 - Numero Dos

Day 28 - Numero Dos
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

Just had Huevos a la Mexicana for lunch...mmm mmm... Good...

Suprisingly, this dump looks nothing like what I feel the huevos have

brewing... I have a pretty good feeling that I'm in for an

afternoon/evening of gas and gas and more gas... Gas in my cubicle, gas

on the elevator, gas on the subway, gas at dinner, and some very gassy

sex. Wow, does that sound attractive or what? Gassysex.com that could

be a great porn site... I'm sure there are people that have a fetish for

that... Getting a big puff of methane in their face when they are

getting busy... Es loco, no?



Wow, as I write this message, more poop... My colon is continuing to

produce massive amounts of hot poop... Colon cleanse definitely seems to

be working... I think (as I glance betwixt my legs) that the huevos are

starting to actually come out... Whatever it is, it's HOT and GASSY! OH

and SUPER LIQUIDY!!! I think we've waded through the non-huevos portion

and are straight into crapping out huevos that I only ate 2 hours ago!!!

UNREAL!!!



dumpstin

Day 28 - a beautiful morning!

Day 28 - a beautiful morning!
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

Wow, it's just so nice to take a crap in the morning... You feel lighter

on your feet, it clears your head, and it's just good wholesome F-U-N!

This was a nice one... Have a great day everyone!!!

dumpstin

Day 27 - Poo Shuttle Atlantis

Day 27 - Poo Shuttle Atlantis
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

Wow, the rocket boosters have fallen off the side, the dump has left my

atmosphere... This one is just floating in a zero gravity environment.

I feel like I could dump again... Even though this shuttle is a healthy

size, I still think there are more Poostronauts that are wanting to suit

up and launch. I'm gonna be patient... Let's see what happens...



For those of you just tuning in, we're on day 27 of Dr. Natura Colon

cleanse... I was constipated before I started this cleanse but now

things are going quite well as you can see...



I had navy bean soup for lunch yesterday and I think I didn't chew some

of the beans very well... They appear to be coming out as normal size

beans. Oh, Houston, we have a problem! Here's the second launch...

Wow, this is a lot of crap. This is the shit that keeps on giving.



I'm going to lose communication with you as my shit orbits into the

sewer so until then...

One small dump for man... One giant dump for mankind

-dumpstin

Day 26 - Funky Floater

Day 26 - Funky Floater
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

Just when you thought things were getting back to normal, all the old fads come back... like bell bottoms in 1997, this funky old looking poop comes back to slap the water. Out of control in the bowl - this thing doesn't have a head, doesn't have a tail, it's just gettin groovy on the yellow dance bowl.

All right,
Dumpstin

Day 24 - Trifecta

Day 26 - Trifecta
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

Unbelievable day. there is something about when things come in threes. it's
a magical power that's hard to explain. I can't say that I like wiping 3
times, I prefer wiping once, but 3 is OK. Wiping 7 times sucks.

Crapping 3 times a day is really great though. I have to give it up to the
colon cleanse. this is definitely not the way I used to be.

Shooting Three's,

-dumpstin

Day 24 - #2... A Classic

Day 24 - #2... A Classic
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

So this is just a classic old school dump - nothing fancy - no crazy colors,

no crazy fiber - just an all american shit. The kind of shit

that you feel pride and an all-over feeling of "hey, life is pretty great".

Shits can do that to you... You could be bummed out, having an oh-so-aweful

day when suddenly you give birth (I think of each one as a part of me, so

birth is not too strong of a word) to a wonderful brown log... Oh and I'm so

proud of my baby log when I see that she can swim!



"Atta girl! You can swim! You can swim! You can SWIM!!!



Loving Life,

dumpstin

Day 24 - Break the silence!

Day 24 - Break the silence!
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

So no dump on day 23... CRAZY! And this dump is just a regular old

dump...

I'm thinking that either my body is stabilized and I don't have any more

crazy waste to eliminate or my diet isn't healthy enough to trigger a

good daily dump... Anyways, it's still early today. A long day of

potential dumps lies on the horizon...

dumpstin

Day 22 - 6:00 Dumparoo

Day 22 - 6:00 Dumparoo
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

Wow, late day dump... Didn't dump this morning.. Looks like a pretty

healthy dump... Gonna order another 30 days of the colon cleanse...



Rock out with your colon out...

dumpstin

Day 21 - dump#2 -hot acid

Day 21 - dump#2 -hot acid
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

Whoa - somethin is burning up my rectum... Some HOT dump coming out. I

took a couple bites of me old man's italian beef sandy last night and -

whoa - this dump is MEGA nasty! It's a total coincidence, but I just

happened to bring this plastic fork into the bathroom... I was at corner

bakery for lunch and took a plastic fork that I never used... I didn't

want to put it back and didn't want to throw it away, so I kept it.



There is some kind of weird pod shaped thing on the first turd that came

out... And the rest of the dump is strangely multicolored...



Used the fork to dissect... Putrid stinky... All in the name of

journalism

dumpstin

Day 21 - Dump #1 dump#1

Day 21 - Dump #1 dump#1
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

Isn't this a lot of fun



So chickity check this... Me morning dump - took at about 9am..



Cheers mate

dumpstin

Day 20 - late afternoon dump

Day 20 - late afternoon dump
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

Wow - check out this weird multicolored crap... Looks like the last of

my sunday night spinach sesh is in here (in assrope form) along with

some more recent fibrous blasting... Enjoy.

dumpstin

Day 19 - bro poop

Day 19 - bro poop
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

So my brother, Dung, and I were just simul-shitting while on the

phone... He took a big dump, mine was little...



Nice work, Dung!



-dumpstin

Day 19 - more green poop

Day 19 - more green poop
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

Here's another green one - long, skinny, and GREEN... Must be the

spinach, I guess...

dumpstin

Day 19 - rockin it out

Day 19 - rockin it out
Originally uploaded by dumpstin.

I said



So HERE I GO again ON MY OWN dumpin down the only dump I've EVER

KNOWN! Like a shitter I was born to shit alone!



But I've made up my mind! Gonna shit an assrope one more time... Here

I goooooo again....



Man, this thing is GREEN... Don't know why, but I have eaten a TON of

spinach in the last 2 days...

dumpstin